Welcome To Cool Quotes Home Links Contacts Friday, November 20, 2009

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  Funny Quotes
"Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million." --
Arnold Schwarzenegger
"Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem."
Bill Vaughan
"Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours."
Yogi Berra
"Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box."
Wil Shriner
"It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens."
Woody Allen
"How could they tell? " (upon hearing that President Coolidge had died)
Dorothy Parker
"There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?"
Woody Allen
"For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off."
Johnny Carson
"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick -- not wounded -- dead."
Woody Allen
"The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates."
Dave Barry