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"Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions."
"I call that mind free which jealously guards its intellectual rights and powers, which calls no man master, which does not content itself with a passive or hereditary faith, [and] receives new truth as an angel from Heaven."
"If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative."
"I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia."
"The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people. Of course, the bad people enjoy the waking hours much more."
"I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers."
"When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me."
"Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions."
"What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?"
"I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose."