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"As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools."

"Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God."

"God tells us to burden him with whatever burdens us."

"Weave in faith and God will find the thread."

"Maybe the atheist cannot find God for the same reason a thief cannot find a policeman."

"You can tell the size of your God by looking at the size of your worry list. The longer your list, the smaller your God."

"Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off."

"When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 a minute."

"We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it."

"A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip."

 

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