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  woody allen quotes
"How to make God laugh: Tell him your future plans."

"If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank."

"Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast."

"Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions."

"Sex relieves tension - love causes it."

"Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best."

"I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception.I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.'"

"I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me."

"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead."

"Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage."

 

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